We had the opportunity to attend some amazing weddings for our friends and family in the years prior to our own big day. After we got engaged, these weddings naturally became sources of great inspiration on what we wanted to emulate for ourselves and what we wanted to do differently. One thing became a bit of a recurring theme for me as a future groom: many of the husbands-to-be had seemingly little to no involvement in the planning process. I saw quite a few grooms roll up to their venue completely in awe of the florals, the décor, the drink and food options, and even the band selection. I knew right away that I wanted to be more involved than most. Not to the degree of any insistence on napkin texture necessarily, but I did want to co-author the aesthetic feel of the day at the very least.

Kira and I quickly and easily came to the mutual decision that our wedding was to be a meeting of an Italian landscape with Brazilian food elements. These are my two prominent heritages so I felt like I won the lottery there. Specifically, the venue already brought the majestic and dreamy element of a Tuscan villa to the forefront, so we wanted to complement that with our choice of florals and colors. We have always kind of moved through the “seasons” of our lives together, as Kira loves to say, with corresponding colors at time. At this juncture, we were both in a sage and forest green ear. I think we still are.

So with those guidelines in place, I participated in almost every selection. I attended meetings with the florist, had an amazing time at the menu tasting with our caterer, and carefully looked through the many options for photography and live music. Being a bit of a photographer myself, I knew I had specifics on what I was looking for in that department, for example. Sometimes I would defend a choice that I really liked, other times I would defer to Kira. With almost every choice being at least passed by me, I also ended up developing a relationship and understanding with our wonderful wedding planner. I think that helped it all feel more familiar on the day, and instead of being surprised, it ended up feeling like the realization of a shared dream.

Once we established this overarching theme so to speak, I can admit that the rest really was spearheaded by her creativity and choices. Kira, to her immense credit, would come to me with quick questions like “what do you think of these three napkin colors?” or “do you have any preference for the kind of wood table you like in this rustic farm style?” Having her pre-select things down to a few, instead of the entire world of options open to me, was incredibly helpful to keep me from feeling overwhelmed. How she kept herself from feeling overwhelmed, is a blog entry and counseling session you will probably have to look to find elsewhere on this site.